I've waited many years to be happy on Mother's Day. To not want to stay under the covers. To be able to face the joy that my friends and family were experiencing on their first Mother's Day with their brand new babes, or their excitement as they were looking at their protruding bellies and be happy for them. Truly happy for them. I feel joy, but I should be happy. I've got a perfect little boy who has been talking about the perfect Mother's Day gift for weeks. I am a mom.
I can't help but have a heavy heart today. I want to only feel the joy, but I keep thinking of all the women who are still waiting to feel this joy. The women who want to be happy for the women in their lives with new babies, or babies on the way, but are so burdened with their own sorrow, that they will have to fake it. I can't help but think about the women who will never get to raise their children. The women who make the most difficult decision that nobody should ever have to make. Today and tomorrow I will be thinking and hoping for these women. May they get through another day where women are celebrated for having children. May they get through another day where they will undoubtedly think about the children that they no longer get to parent.